i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
