You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Randomize
