sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
