You're so nebulous sometimes
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Randomize
