Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
