Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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