Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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