I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
