He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize