I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize