sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
