Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Randomize
