brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize