Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
