I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
