I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I'm sobbing to NWA
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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