it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
