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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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