Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
