he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Randomize
