woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
