mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize