do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Randomize
