I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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