i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Randomize
