he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
