KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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