Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize