How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
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