We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
