my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize