You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
