is your mom at the bar?
operation have a gay friend backfired
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize