Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
