finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Randomize