idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
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