He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize
