this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
