i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
