4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Randomize
