I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
