Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
