I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
My balls are so social today.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
