i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
So much Jack, so little girl.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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