Four minutes until I can fart!
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize
