we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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