its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
