Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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