I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
