Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Randomize