My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Randomize
