so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
